Chasing Pavements

Who are we kidding? we ARE terrorists

I have chosen the very first item in my future home!!!!!

I already own a set of utensils, but my mother in law was the one who chose and both them for us, so this is practically the first thing I choose for my home. 
My mom had bought these tiny pressure jars from a small cute shop in Marj al-Hamam and used them to store spices. I thought they were nice and useful, and asked her to get me some, and now I have 5.. can you believe it? this is the first item I choose for my home (have I said that too many times?)

Is it politically incorrect to call them ghettos? well they are, and I actually grew up in one so I should know. 

By the way, I am very thankful I grew up in a ghetto, I think it made me way tougher than I could have become if I grew up in our current fafy area. It used to be very dear to me.. before I started hating Jordan and everything about it. 

When we moved out from our old house I cried my eyes out everyday for months. I just could not get over the fact that I cannot play in the street covered in mud, walk my way to school, or listen to people's noises all the time. Now, it is different.

For a long time, I wanted to own a traditional vintage thobe, Jordanian or Palestinian no difference. I have always thought they are the most beautiful things anyone could wear, and I am crazy about traditional attires in general. So, I asked my mom to get me a genuine vintage thobe, and she called one of her friends to ask where we can get one. 

My mom's friend, one of the kindest people you can ever meet, said that she wants to give me her own dress! my mom said okay thank you, and we set out on a journey to our good old neighborhood.
It was very hard for me to miss it on our way there, the terrible traffic, people's shitty driving, and the horrific streets made me hate life itself. But once we have arrived, I could see that the house was on top of a mountain with an incredible view of Amman

Since my life is going through, and will go through, some major changes, I have decided to start taking as many photos as I can of everything and everyone around me because I know that in a few months I'll look back at these days and miss them so much.
Here we go: April!

I promised myself a while a go not to document negative feelings and sad moments in my blog. But right now it feels like I am all alone and I need to let some of it out.

I had a dream last night. Toto and I were in a class as if we were students again. There was a guy in the back who kept making jokes, also there were fafy girls whispering and making noise, and the teacher was Dr Rinad. I don't know what brought that into my unconscious mind, but it made me miss university and miss the times when everything was simpler and cuter and easier, and you didn't have to be nice to certain people to please them and you didn't have to wear certain things and go to certain places..

I know that this is a dark moment and that I am insistingly staring at the empty half of the glass, but right now all I want is to be 19 again sitting on our special bench outside the faculty of languages and laughing my heart out with my friends.

Yesterday was the last day at my job. I already miss my friends there.. and my office.. and even Shaheen!

المرأة السعوديه بدل ما تسوق سياره 

في إلها سياره فاخره وسواق خصوصي 

في نسآء تضطهد في جميع العالم وما في 

عيون اعلاميه عليها